Preaching for advent

I have a memory of a debate between my aunt and my grandfather from the early 90s.

They were standing in my grandparent’s kitchen in Hagerstown, Maryland. Aunt Missy had been invited to preach at the church where my Pappy was the pastor, and I tagged along for the weekend. The debate came out of the sermon, or rather the style of crafting a sermon. Missy is a gifted writer and an author, and she had taken the time to write out her sermon. Pappy sweetly questioned her about it. He said he didn’t like to write too many notes before preaching, because he didn’t feel like he was giving enough room for the Spirit to move in him during the moment of preaching (he was influenced by a Holy Spirit movement in the Church of the Brethren later in life, and his spirituality was marked by a radical obedience to the spontaneity of the Spirit).

Aunt Missy carefully pushed back and said she experienced great movement from the Holy Spirit at her desk during the week as she prepared. And that preparedness showed respect for both the Spirit and the congregation with which she was sharing.

I’m not exactly sure why this moment was so formative for me. It could have been the topic interested me and I found the idea of theological debate intriguing. Or it may have been the first time I had seen two family members argue well. Grounded in their own point of view, but making space for the other. It certainly reflected the work they both had done in their lives of speaking truth and seeking reconciliation.

I didn’t know at the time the deep influence they would both have on my life. Pappy’s experience of the Spirit led me to participating in a Holy Spirit conference at the age of 14 that grounded me deeply in the love of God, and dispelled doubts I had over the existence of God at the time. Missy’s thoughtful care for the written word and for healthy churches guide my own steps even as I write this blog.

During seminary, I had a wonderful opportunity to take a preaching class, where the mandate was to write out the sermon. I enjoyed it so much that ever since I have been the first to volunteer to preach in whatever congregation where I find myself. I love digging into the text during the week. Letting it sit in me, infusing with my own life story, and the news of what’s happening in the greater world. I love bringing the word in a careful, thoughtful way, and sitting down to write is a critical part of the journey.

But when it was time to preach during this particular advent season, I found myself and the sermon I was going to preach needing something different. I decided to try out another part of my relationship with the Spirit; the one I have inherited in part from my Pappy. I made a simple outline. I filled it in a little in my mind (but not word for word). I carried the outline in my pocket when I preached this past Sunday, though I didn’t pull it out.

I noticed the experience was scarier. I didn’t always know what was coming next. But I felt freer. I looked more into the eyes of the congregation, I had a sense of the emotions my words were generating which made me feel like I was present with them. I don’t know that this will be my new style when it comes to preaching, but I get why Pappy chose not to fill in too many of the gaps. I loved the thrill of leaving gaps for the Holy Spirit to fill in, and I’m challenged to look for other ways to do that in my life, especially in this busy Christmas season.